THE day after the 2019 General Election, a woman from Durham took herself to Twitter to start howling at the moon.
The election, she said, had been “a fix”. Actually, Jeremy Corbyn had won. But he was cheated out of it.
Offering advice to whoever is our next Prime Minister, Rishi or Liz, he warned them: ‘It’s not Twitter that counts’[/caption]
As David Cameron put it: ‘Too many tweets make a twat’[/caption]
This deluded hag, who went under the name “Lisa”, had direct evidence for that.
She had been out campaigning for the ghastly local Labour candidate Laura Pidcock.
I’m delighted to say Laura lost and the Tory candidate won.
According to Lisa it MUST have been fixed because: “The new Tory MP Richard Holden rarely gets 200 likes on a tweet or Facebook post, yet Laura gets thousands within minutes . . . ”
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And there you have the reason why the Left is so deranged and almost always wrong.
Or at least one of the reasons.
They think that Twitter is the entire world.
If Twitter says something, it must be true.
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It is weird how so many people can be so dim.
In his farewell address to the Commons, Boris Johnson said one of the truest things he has ever uttered. (Yes, yes, not much competition for that prize, I know.)
Offering advice to whoever is our next Prime Minister, Rishi or Liz, he warned them: “It’s not Twitter that counts.”
Dead right. Very wise words — because, incredibly, even beyond the Left some people take Twitter seriously.
Public relations dingbats, for example, and special advisers.
They see that something is trending on Twitter and they get themselves into a right old state.
They become terrified that public opinion is swinging against them.
They force their company, or their politician, to retract whatever it is they said that caused the online hoo-ha.
And they make things much, much worse for themselves.
They don’t understand that the silent majority — those people not forever stabbing at their phones with spittle dribbling down their chins and signing off #crazierthan-ashithouserat — couldn’t give a toss about what’s trending on Twitter.
They believe — rightly — that, as David Cameron put it: “Too many tweets make a twat”.
Listen, Twitter is not remotely reflective of public opinion.
It is a convocation of shrieking, obsessive, liberal woo-woos. Jabbering to one another. Reinforcing each others’ opinions.
Don’t take my word for it, though.
The very rich Elon Musk was going to buy Twitter.
He described it as having “a strong left-wing bias”.
OK, not everybody on Twitter is clinically insane and further to the right than a fish knife.
I know some people who tweet from time to time and they’re kind of OK, although I wouldn’t let them run anything.
But this is the other point. Twitter isn’t even representative of, er . . . people who use Twitter.
Yes, I know that sounds crazy. But it’s true.
They did a study in the USA. It seems that 80 per cent of the content of Twitter is provided by just ten per cent of users.
So the site is dominated by a tiny percentage of truly obsessive, self-righteous, w**kpuffins with far too much time on their hands.
The journalist and former Conservative politician Dan Hannan — now Baron Hannan to you — tried to fathom out why Twitter was so left-wing.
He came to the conclusion that it is because the medium lends itself to short, emotive statements.
And the Left likes nothing more than short emotive statements, usually ending with “Tory scum!”
That’s maybe part of it.
But more importantly, the vast majority of people in this country are not political obsessives, as another Tory grandee, Lord Tebbit, once pointed out.
They would quite like a decent government, sure.
They know how to define a “woman”.
They wouldn’t mind the occasional tax cut, either.
But they do not generally involve themselves with the political debate.
Truth be told, it bores them rigid.
And they are not so full of themselves they think they know the answer to every political question.
They just get on with their lives and leave the Twitterati to it.
Those are the people who matter, if you are a politician who wants to win an election.
They comprise the 68 per cent of the population who NEVER goes on Twitter.
Because only 19million Brits have a Twitter account. And — remember that survey — this means that fewer than two million are on it all the time, screaming blue murder.
So if politicians take too much notice of Twitter’s blind fury, then the country is being dictated to by about four per cent of the population.
This is something to bear in mind next time you hear a comedian is “trending” because he told a joke that offended someone.
Or that there’s outrage over a plan to deport asylum seekers to Rwanda.
It’s not the country speaking.
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It’s just a tale told by idiots, full of sound and fury and signifying nothing.
It’s just Twitter.
So if politicians take too much notice of Twitter’s blind fury, then the country is being dictated to by about four per cent of the population[/caption]